Food is always an important part of any party. Our parents and grandparents taught us how to act at the dinner table to avoid the dreadful faux pas – but the rules that your great-grandparents dictated may no longer make sense in our society of fast food, smartphones and split-second attention spans.
While some of the etiquette we learned as children is fading into memory, it is still somewhat expected to leave your elbows off the table, keep your napkin in your lap, and keep your trap shut while you’re chewing – but these table rules were king during the early part of the 20th century, and have since become not only defunct, but outrageous. Get a peek of what was expected in prohibition-era America “at table” with these hilariously outdated table etiquette rules from Emily Post’s “Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at Home”:
“Etiquette absolutely demands that one leave a card within a few days after taking a first meal in a lady’s house;”
- “When Cards Must Be Left”, Chapter 10
While it is nice to thank your host, it’s beyond expectation to do more than express your gratitude upon leaving. It is nearly unheard of to come knocking at one’s door days later, nor would it be invited in today’s age!
Miss Post published an entire chapter on the use of calling cards. Today, this practice is SO anti-green (and intrusive)!
“When Mrs. Oldname calls on Mrs. Stranger the first time, the latter may do nothing but call in return; it would be the height of presumption to invite one of conspicuous prominence until she has first been invited by her. Nor may the Strangers ask the Oldnames to dine after being merely invited to a tea.”
- “When Position Has Been Established”, Chapter 9
The “social ladder” of old has all but disappeared. While structure was important in the old days, the sense of a societal hierarchy is now laughable. This may have to do with the imbalance in wealth, or simply that we’re all too busy to care. Either way, the rules no longer apply when it comes to inviting people to dinner – if you’re comfortable hosting them, it’s fair game!
“From the setting of the table until it is cleared for dessert, a plate must remain at every cover. Under the first two courses there are always two plates… But when the soup plate is removed, the underneath plate is removed with it, and a hot plate immediately exchanged for the two taken away.”
- “The Ever-Present Plate”, Chapter 14
If ever you need to be thoroughly confused, just read this section on the use of plates. Also, if plate-purchasing is an impulse for you, you can use this outdated table etiquette rule as an excuse to stockpile!
“One can be pretty sure on seeing a red velvet carpet spread down the steps of a house… that there are people for dinner. The carpet is kept rolled, or turned under near the foot (or top) of the steps until a few minutes before the dinner hour when it is spread across the width of the pavement by the chauffeur or whoever is on duty on the sidewalk.”
- “Sidewalk, Hall and Dressing Rooms”, Chapter 14
When you or I think of a red carpet, celebrities come to mind immediately. Perhaps the high-society tradition carried through time only for the rich and famous – but if you can afford a chauffeur, might as well make your guests feel like royalty! Really, though, this etiquette rule is hilariously outdated.
“In an envelope addressed to each gentleman is put a card on which is written the name of the lady he is to take down to dinner.”
- “The Envelopes for the Gentlemen”, Chapter 14
This is a laughably old tradition, and an elaborate one at that. When a dinner party was thrown, all guests would first be presented in the drawing room, where these envelopes would be situated, along with a seating chart for dinner. Each gentlemen would find out who he was to “take down” to dinner, meaning to take the lady’s arm and assist her to her seat. While ladies today still enjoy doors being held and chairs slid out for us, the concept of requiring a gentleman’s arm to assist us to dinner is hilarious. Miss Post would be shocked to see the amount of women today who dine alone!
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